All Who Are Mortal
by DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin
Summary: Within her heart swelled an abyss of hatred, an inferno of flames licking beneath her skin as she stumbled down the church steps. She'd butchered everything - the city, the earth, and his love...she'd burned that alive. RobxRae. Blinging Light Re-Write.
1. Chapter 1

**All Who Are Mortal**

Chapter 1

Author: Death

Disclaimer: I, Death, do hereby state that I neither own,  
nor have any relationship/agreement with those who do own, the rights to Teen Titans.  
This story was written for nothing more than enjoyment and the love of my fans.  
I am making no profit off of this story, nor was that ever my intention.

Read and Review. Use Your Voice.

* * *

Raven stood quietly at the roof's edge, buzzing currents of electricity crackling over her cape and winding static through her hair. The night air reeked of storm, its wet humidity choked in her nose and fusing with the putrescent stenches of seawater and dank soil. Violet eyes narrowed beneath her hood, glowering at the spitting surf as it crashed against the shore.

Raven's gaze swirled with defiant chaos, her fingers sparking with black lightning in her fleeting control. The bolts danced around her fingertips, snapping with paramount surges that far surpassed the sparks flickering in the clouds above. She winced as the pressure began to concentrate, the tiny fissures of tissue-like powers weaving and tightening. With a hiss, she fought for control of her mutinous emotions, but her mind was occupied with fatigue and her dominion was quickly overruled.

A strangled cry tore from her throat as the energy exploded from her gloved fingertips, streaking black and green into the sky and slashing through the clouds. It jump-started the tempest and a ruby chain of lightning erupted from the storm, splitting the soil with a thunderous clap. It shook the earth like a giant's fist, hurling a mighty tremor across the grounds and through Titan Tower.

Raven swayed with the roof as she panted, massive drops of rain pounding against the metal roof and her vinyl hood. Her ears rang from the blast, beads of sweat running down her temples and curving along the sides of her face. She placed a tingling palm to her forehead, her chest heaving as she fought for inner peace. In her eyes, her panicked despondency sparkled with clarity, and Raven balked at that unsettling fact as the rain hammered her shoulders. She couldn't leash them anymore; it was too late. Futile. And the repercussions were getting worse.

Each moment of every day, she could feel her emotions pulse and writhe throughout her nerves, thirsting for release and destruction. In whispers, they muttered their aggravation at her refusal, and all the while they revolted, her powers grew.

The new strength and accuracy of her telekinetic skill alone was overwhelming, and Raven regularly found herself shut up in her room, pouring frantically over her mantra in order to drown out the conversations of her fellow titans. Mental and vocal alike, she could hear their voices easily from anywhere on Titan grounds; and Starfire's giddy pop records and screeching sing-a-longs were starting to press her nerves.

Her vision was changing, _heightening_, and had already become so unnaturally crisp that there were moments in the day where Raven would find herself, to her immense vexation, distracted by the fantastic shapes of the dust particles in the air. Their mischievous shadows would catch her eye, and she would watch with fascination as they twirled and circled on tiny, inconceivable air currents.

Night was little more than a gray-scale of day; and Raven found herself constantly awed and terrified by her clear, easy vision in the earliest hours of morning.

Raven closed her eyes and titled her head back, allowing the cool, thundering rain to strike against her cheeks. It stung, but she couldn't rouse enough attention within herself to care. A roaring thunderclap brought her head up, and her gaze shifted from the ugly clouds to the churning seawater below.

The storm's fury sent it crashing hard against the rocky coast, and she watched the gray waters froth in the agitation. She marveled silently, consumed by the notion that such a large, deadly element could so easily be made helpless by a simple, whistling wind.

Her wonder faded as the similarities between herself and the sea stirred her mind. The thought cemented a bitter taste in her mouth; for what s her father, but her own whistling wind?

Raven stared down at her hands, her eyes heavy, "…What am I going to do?"

Her disquiet was fissured by a directing voice, "Where's Raven? That storm's getting worse."

Raven scowled; and she had been blocking them out so well… One boy's stupid notice of her lack of presence and her progress was instantly for nothing.

As her carefully built wall crumbled, the buzzing bleeps and horns of Cyborg and BeastBoy's video game instantly flooded her ears, as well as Starfire's off-key humming and the heavy, metallic plunking of rain against the roof.

Raven rubbed her temples with wet fingers, willing away the noise and her grim situation.

"I don't know. The roof, I think," she heard Cyborg mutter, his fingers clicking away his controller.

She heard an additional click and then the soft "bleep" of the Pause Screen, followed by Beast Boy's scratching voice, "You want me to get her?"

"Hah," Cyborg snorted, "She'll _love_ that."

"Hn," Robin acknowledged softly, "No, I'd better do it. Be right back."

Raven sighed as she heard the elevator door close and the game recommence, her irritated face smoldering beneath the cold rain. When had she become an incapable child?

Robin's boots were loud on the tiled floor as he left the lift, and they clunked against the top-level stairs with his approach. Raven frowned, turning to meet him as he opened the door.

She glared, and he ignored her, "What're you doing? It's a hurricane out here."

Raven's shoulders stiffened, "I'm meditating."

Robin blinked slowly, "In a severe thunderstorm…."

"Yes."

Robin raised his eyebrows, the corners of his mouth tilted unhappily. She didn't speak, and after a few uncomfortable minutes, he sighed and scratched the back of head, "Well alright, I guess. Come in when you're ready."

Raven's anger flared and she didn't watch him leave, turning on her heal and lifting her eyes to the sky. The door banged closed behind her and she felt her fingers shake with an unsettling, unprovoked rage. It scared her more than she dared to admit, and she closed her eyes and forced her mind to clear; the shaking stopped.

She couldn't decide if it was that Robin had become more irritating to her on an unconscious level, or if her control was simply that far gone. Lately, everything he did bothered her, incensed her, _enraged_ her.

She wondered if it was because he believed that she was tormented over their last battle with Slade, and she knew it angered him to think of her morning such a creature. Often, Raven wondered if their leader was just a tad resentful about how the whole ordeal had played out, but she decided not to pry. She had shut his mind out long ago.

Robin's aggravation with her was infuriating, quite like everything else about him nowadays. The battle was hardly anything to be regretful about. It had been a fierce, violent affair that they had triumphed over, even after most of the Titans had given up hope. They'd fought hard and true right until the closure-less end, each broken in new ways and heavily wounded. They had shattered as a unit- however, once it was silent and the rain had stopped, the Titans were they only ones left standing. They had succeeded. Beaten an enemy in a way they had never beaten another. Slade was finished. He would never come back...

_Raven glanced up as another flash of lightning illuminated the sky. The Titans were dispersed, hiding in the blinding light and trees. _

_Rain dripped from her fingers and the tips of her boots, rolling down her cape and nose and pit-pattering against the ground below. She mentally scowled and pulled her hood over her head; her face was instantly shrouded in darkness. _

_Feeling rather apathetic, she flew above, dragging her gaze over the scattered bodies of Slade's soldiers and her woodsy surroundings as she searched for her companions.A loud cracking sound shot through the air and Raven swung around, watching as Starfire stretched a glowing ball of green light between her palms. The alien floated a few yards away, her ruby hair plastered against her shoulders, her emerald eyes bright and locked on the man below. _

_Despite the comet sized hole smoldering in the soil to his right, Slade seemed to disregard Starfire as a threat, and instead of counterattacking, he raised his gaze to Raven. _

_The second ball of emerald light hit him square in the chest, and he shot backward, crashing hard into an old oak tree. _

_Raven's powers danced around her gloved fingertips as she flew to her female teammate. Starfire's features were twisted into a mask of exceptional anger, her flawless face so tightly contorted with hate that she hardly looked like herself. _

_"He nearly killed Robin." She hissed, sparing Raven a glare, "Where were you?" _

_Before Raven could so much as mutter a reply, Robin called to her from behind. She turned to see him sprinting toward the clearing where they hovered, his uniform mud stained and his face red with blood. There was a furious joy in his eyes when his gaze met hers, _

_"Yank him loose!" _

_Raven nodded, raising her arms over her head and muttering her mantra. Slade's armored body ripped away from the bark just as Star's green fire suffocated under her dark energy. She held him just above the ground, releasing him a moment before Robin's foot connected with his head. _

_A sick crack sounded among the thunder as Slade's mask split and he hit the dirt, splashing mud across Robin's face. The tromping vibrations of Cyborg's metal boots shook the ground from behind them. _

_A shot of electric blue power whizzed across the ground, singeing the wet grass before slamming into Slade's body and tossing him into the air. He hit the tree again, this time breaking through it; he flew for a dozen yards before skidding to a rough stop. The Titans scattered as the tree tipped in their direction, regrouping below under Robin's command and advancing._

_Slade lay motionless in the wet grass as they crowded around him, earth caked on his armor and broken mask. Had Raven been capable of pity at that moment, she may have felt sorry for him. But emotions were indispensable; they needed to end this. _

_A look of mangled hatred on Robin's face, the Boy Wonder remained motionless, rain pouring off his chin as he clenched and unclenched his fingers. Raven had never seen him so uncontrolled, and she felt her nerves prickle from his intensity. Beast Boy's cheetah face was full of dark curiosity, his head cocked innocently to the side. He was the first to break the silence, _

_"Is he dead?" _

_Robin's jaw locked and he narrowed his eyes, "Doubtful." _

_Raven stared idly down at the crippled man, thinking it suddenly odd, despite their last agonizing hours of battle, that this was a man who had once been a great threat. He looked meek, _tame_. It was almost disgusting. _

_Robin's face seemed to reflect her thoughts as bent down to get a better look. There was a soft beep, and then a red light burst from the center of Slade's chest, sending Robin stumbling backward as it expanded and consumed the whole team. Blinded by red, Raven heard her teammates call for her and called back, trying to reach them mentally and finding her telekinetic abilities blocked. She called again, and a high-pitched scream was her only reply. It was gone as quickly as it came. _

_"Star!" Robin's voice cut through the silence and Raven's heart skipped a beat, "Beast Boy? Cyborg?" _

_Silence. _

_Raven snarled and jumped into the air, her body breaking past the red. Her vision instantly cleared and she glanced around her, searching frantically for her team. _

_"Raven?" _

_She shook her head and dove down, zooming through the red and yelling for Robin. He answered to her abrupt left and she swerved to get him. Snatching his wrist, she yanked him up, lifting him with her powers once they cleared the crimson dome. His eyes darted around the grounds, anxiously hunting for their fellow titans._

_"Can you see them?" _

_Raven shook her head, "No." _

_She saw Robin's shoulders tense out of the corner of her eye and turned to face him. He was watching her with narrowed eyes, and she returned the look with equal merit. _

_"What?" She snapped. _

_"Your lack of concern is irritating." _

_Raven stared at him in disbelief, and then anger, "This isn't my fault, Robin, so spare me the punishment. We'll find them." _

_With a glare, she lowered him to the ground, "You search out here. I'm going back in to make sure we didn't overlook anyone." _

_Robin nodded his agreement and she left him, diving back through the red mist. _

_Her vision was immediately worthless, and Raven pulled her senses forward and used what little she had to guide her. The air was thick in her lungs, suffocating. She cleared her throat, veering to the left and pondering the properties of the mist surrounding her._ 'Strange, but somehow eerily familia_- A heavy blow to the gut brought her to an abrupt stop, and with a strangled cry she hit the ground. _

_Raven's head hit the soil hard and she winced, lifting one hand to her head and tangling the other in the wet grass at her thigh. She tugged harshly against the weeds, her head screaming as she yanked herself upright. A swift boot to the sternum stopped her and she fell back again, the air whooshing from her lungs. _

_A low chuckle rumbled in her ears as she fought to breathe, and then an immense pressure was on her throat. The slimy feeling of thick mud slithered down the sides of her neck and pooled in her hood; Raven scowled. _

_"I should have known it wasn't over." _

_At the malice in Slade's voice, chills broke out across Raven's skin, sending an unconscious shiver down her spine. He noticed and pleased with himself, ground his boot harder against her esophagus. Raven sputtered in her blindness, willing her powers to her aid; but they remained nothing more than a soft buzzing in her fingers. She could not summon them. _

_"Such a hindrance, those powers, aren't they? Here one minute, and then…" The sound of snapping fingers bellowed in her ringing ears, and the slight buzz in her fingers died altogether, "Gone the next."_

_Raven clawed her fingers down Slade's leg, scratching and pushing at his boot; it was futile. _

_"There, there, little bird, all in good time. I have a message for you first." _

_In an instant, her vision cleared and Raven found herself face to face with a man she had so foolishly believed to be tame. Part of his mask had fallen away, revealing the peculiar shape of his mouth, and two rows of yellow teeth. His smile chilled her heart. _

_"He wants you." His voice was cool, professional almost, in his conquest. Raven felt her stomach churn, and Rage set her claws deep into her mind, enraged, demanding; he wouldn't be able to restrain her powers for long. _

_"Your father told him _everything_. Every detail of your childhood, your mother, your powers, our...rebellion. He says 'It's time'" Slade shook his head in amused awe, his single eye completely bemused as he studied her, "...Absolutely exquisite, your family." _

_A flash of white light alerted him to his wrist, and Slade flipped a small panel open just as the red dome surrounding them vanished. _

_"Ah," He sighed, sparing her a glance as he slightly relieved the strain on her neck, "It's finished." _

_Raven coughed, wheezing as a large wave of air rushed down her throat and swelled in her withered lungs. It was all the relief she needed, and Rage was liberated._

_With a swipe of her arm, she sent Slade sprawling, his armored torso clashing against the dirt with a dull thud. She lunged, a low growl slipping past her lips and she landed sharply on his stomach, her claw-like fingers wrapping around his throat._

_Raven hardly noticed the slow of time, but all around them the rain had halted, suspended beautifully in purgatory. The wind, which had so fiercely been tossing leaves, was quelled, and the brown, wilted foliage found refuge from torment. Lightning chains froze in the sky, and yet Raven and Slade were unchanged._

_Dark energy poured free from her hands, Slade's authority over her powers broken in her loss of control. She roared as she heaved him from the ground, their feet dangling as she lifted them into the air. With a hiss, she swung him with the strength of a titan and sent him flying through the thick trunk of another oak tree. _

_The crackling snap split the silence as the trunk splintered, and Raven sped over, a buzzing ebony cloud of rabid lightning. Slade's mangled form was deeply indented within the earth, his mask destroyed and crumbling away from his face. She ripped him free, strangling him- and yet, as her fury inflated, so did a cold sense of alarm. She was too lost, too demoralized, and her anger was still increasing; something was wrong._

_Through her arduous haze, she panted, "What… did you… do?"_

_A smile split his bloodied face, and as the last pieces of his mask fell away, Raven felt the world perish. She knew him, had seen him in her dreams...in her dreams about _him_...__**no**__._

"_You," he wheezed, "…are…so _perfect_. But you hide from your perfection. The mist was a gift and a task given to me by your brother- a concoction he forged in the heart of hell with the aid of your father. With it, he said, we would set you free again."_

_Raven felt her heart cripple, die, and in its place grew a seed of hatred so large it consumed her soul. In a motion as fluid as water she swung him around, blasting him with dark energy. Slade shredded through soil and grass alike, creating a crater in the earth until Raven blasted him to a halt. In a moment, she had him pinned, her eyes ruby and hate filled; the expression on his familiar face was nothing less than pure rapture. Raven ground her teeth,_

"_He will destroy you." _

_Slade's laughter was manic, "Somehow, I doubt he'll have the opportunity."_

_Time remembered itself then, and the rain was ravenous. Raven felt it sting her through her cloak, but she ignored it, her ire seething as it ripped through her veins; Rage would have him._

_Her fingernails dug, ripping through armor and cloth and flesh, "They will not have a victory." _

_A strong gust of wind raked over them, twisting Raven's violet hair in the currents and whipping it against her face. Her ruby eyes glowed, her teeth barred, and she felt her fingers sink deeper into Slade's chest._

_He gagged, and the dark part of Raven rejoiced in the sound, until his gargling became laughter. She snarled, slicing her fingers through ribcage, and yet still he laughed, gasping between fits._

_A shrill 'caw' pierced Raven's ears and she felt a set of talons hook onto her shoulder. They bit through cloth and flesh, demanding attention, and Raven turned her crimson gaze. A raven, poised and perfect, stared back at her through red eyes._

_It cawed again and Raven felt her powers surge to an unbearable potency. She cried out at the sudden pain, closing her eyes. Relief came like an explosion, her power ripping free and pouring from her fingertips and into the man beneath her._

_She could hear someone yelling for her, screaming her name. Where were they? Why wouldn't they come? Come and stop this madness. _

_She heard Slade chuckling below and her vision was instantly hazed in red. She met his gaze and felt something stir within her, something dark and twisted and _evil. _It distorted its way through her veins, entwining with her powers. He felt it, and Raven watched as his smile began to fade, and his eyes widened in agony. _

_The darkness was coming, and she felt it vividly within her power, like tar among water. It slunk its way along, through the tips of her fingers and out with her power. Like sludge, it seeped, thick and slow, creeping into Slade's heart. _

_Raven watched him writhe, his limbs contorting as his body fought the inevitable. A retched scream fled his mouth and filled her ears. The noise provoked her darkness. Whatever control she may have had up until that point was lost, fled from her to make way for her ugliness._

_Her eyes turned black and her vision faded, her fingers twisting within him as she poured her hatred into his heart. His screams were loud in her ears as his chest began to glow black with her powers, and the energy that was escaping her grew thicker, darker, and extremely painful..._

_Robin had watched from afar, screaming Raven's name as he supported Beast Boy with one arm and fought to restrain Cyborg with the other._

_Raven screamed and Cyborg roared, fighting Robin until their leader was forced to drop Beast Boy and wrap both arms around his second in command._

_Beast Boy sunk to the ground, withering right next to where Starfire lay unconscious in the grass. Blood stained her purple uniform, originating from the large gash in her side that stretched from rib to hip. She would be fine once Raven saw to her, or so Robin hoped. The alien had lost a lot of blood._

_A flash of black light suddenly illuminated the grounds, followed by the loud bang of an after shock. The earth shook in the blow's wake, and as the ringing subsided in their ears, everything was still, silent. _

_The struggling titans paused for a moment, shaken, for what had once been Slade's body was now nothing more than a bloody pile of flesh and unrecognizable bits of organ. Blood splattered the grass for yards, and Raven was stained with it, her body shaking as the glowing around her hands began to recede._

_Robin held Cyborg tightly, the robotic boy straining against his superior in effort to reach their fellow titan._

"_Stop it, Cyborg! We can't help her right now!"_

"_Let go'a me, Robin! Raven _needs _help!"_

_But what help they could give her, Robin had no idea. Raven was swaying in the wind, her head tipped back as tears poured down the sides of her face._

"_Rae! Hold on, I'm comin'!" Cyborg fought him still, and Robin found himself less and less inclined to hold him back._

_The glow died as slowly as Raven tremors, but eventually she was powerless and still. Robin released his companion, and Cyborg took off at a run, leaping over fallen branches as the rain thundered against his armor._

_He pulled up short as Raven's black eyes met his. The guilty pain in her eyes pierced his heart. Her eyes snapped closed as he faltered and she jerked sporadically, her lips parting in a silent scream before she toppled over and landed with a soft 'thump' in the grass..._

Raven sighed and fazed, re-solidifying in her room below. Slade had been sent to awaken her corruption, and now that he had, there was no turning back. Her powers were restless in their consciousness, thirsty, and becoming more and more defiant each day. If she was grieving over any part of that day, it was that she hadn't killed Slade sooner.

Exhausted, she fell back on her bed, and yet she found no sleep to comfort her. Her world was changing for the worse, and she was going to drag her friends down with her. She needed answers, and unfortunately, the only person she knew who would have them was by far one of her least favorites.

* * *

_Well. Chapter 1 down, plenty more to go. I hope you are enjoying yourselves so far, and I hope you will stick around. There's a rough future ahead of Raven, and an alternate ending to the original story. Wait and see what happens, I'm not giving anything away. -__Death_


	2. Chapter 2

**All Who Are Mortal**

Chapter 2

Author: Death

Disclaimer: I, DeathIsOnlyTheBeginin, do hereby state that I neither own,  
nor have any relationship/agreement with those who do own, the rights to Teen Titans.  
This story was written for nothing more than enjoyment and the love of my fans.  
I am making no profit off of this story, nor was that ever my intention.

Read and Review. Use Your Voice.

* * *

Raven watched as the sun slowly dragged itself over the horizon, ripping through a thick curtain of navy night and brightening the sky with shades of gold and wine. The clouds were frail in the new light, mere remnants of the billowing fullness they'd once been. She watched with a bruised heart as they savored their final moments of morning, her violet eyes shimmering with the torment of her thoughts. Turning away, she pulled her dark curtains closed and banished the emerging morning.

The darkness was instantly suffocating, and though Raven felt the familiar comfort of its embrace, there was something hidden deep inside of it that chilled her. Her feet were light against the floorboards as she crossed the room, her cloak swishing behind her as she hurried to escape.

The hallway was a stark contrast to the dusk of her quarters, fragments of light flickering against the walls as they bounced off the waves outside and poured in through the large windows of the great room. The peace of 5:00AM was addictive and Raven spared an almost loving glance at the silent television as she made her way down the stairs.

The following minutes passed quickly, her morning routines awkward in their triviality. Numb, she curled her legs beneath her as she sat, the couch cushions plump with comfort as she marinated in her pressing worries. The tea cup was uncomfortably hot in her hands, the steam caressing her face with the rich, herbal sent of temptation. She gave in, sipping slowly as she stared out into the startling day. The burn against her hands was raw, demanding, and she focused all of her attention on it; the pain was a welcome distraction.

It helped for only a minute or two.

She'd barely woken half an hour ago and already her emotions were fervently picking at her restraint. She felt Rage hiss through her veins, warming the blood with a brazen flame of furious hatred as she ranted her irritation at her confinement. Sorrow followed dismally behind, singeing Raven's nerves with a crushing agony that threatened to spark tears in her eyes and a catch in her throat. And all the while they damaged her, Joy swelled within her chest, expanding until Raven was sure her ribs would burst free of her skin to alleviate the pressure. Her powers twitched, contorting in her core from all the chaos, surging sparks through her system that rebounded off the walls of her control. Raven wanted to scream from the overload, but instead sipped her tea, pursing her lips a bit tighter than necessary with every bitter swallow.

_I should go to my room_, she thought, but she didn't trust herself to make it through a faze, let alone the slow journey back up the stairs.

As the minutes ticked by, she pushed her restraint to its limits, her composure slowly unraveling as she fought to keep her volatile emotions at bay. And with her intense concentration, she missed the quite thoughts of a risen colleague, and the even less quiet sound of his footsteps.

The cool, metal hand against her shoulder startled her and Raven felt her emotions surge; it almost broke her. Almost.

Cyborg felt Raven jump and removed his hand. He'd completely zoned, his eyes trapt on the reflection of Raven's tortured expression in the window. Common sense had eluded him and he'd blindly followed his brotherly instincts to comfort her. He closed his eyes and waited for that rough monotone voice and irritation, for a stoic quip about unauthorized touching and personal space; but she didn't speak. She never did anymore.

Cyborg watched her complete lack of response closely, realizing that though she'd jumped at his touch moments ago, she didn't seem to have any idea that he was behind her, that he was even in the same room. He frowned.

"Uh, sorry about that, Rae."

Nothing.

Cyborg frowned deeper, a tick starting in his jaw as he moved around the couch. Had he been looking, he would have seen the tension in Raven's jaw increase as she set her teeth, would have seen the sudden panic in her desperate violet gaze.

Raven felt the cushion dip as he took a seat beside her and a cold chill sped down her spine; her emotions thrived against her nerves, intensified by her quiet alarm, waiting…waiting. She wished she was elsewhere. Anywhere. Her room, the roof, Timbuktu, _anywhere _but here. But she couldn't move in her condition. She closed her eyes, helpless, her breathing shallow; _Go away, Cyborg. Go away, go away._

"I'm tired of this, Raven. You don't talk. You don't fight. You don't chill. Spill it - this is about Slade, isn't it?"

The comment sent a flicker of anger through her heart and Raven wanted to cry and laugh at the same time. The very idea was as dangerous as it was terrifying. Part of her screamed at her for not telling them earlier. Maybe if she had, they would have let her be, stayed away from her, understood. But even in the begining she knew this curse was her cross to bear, and as she sat sweating in the calm before her storm, she realized that staying near them was going to set in motion the one thing she was trying to prevent - someone was going to get hurt.

"Robin says that's what's up - that you're upset about Slade. If that's it…man, let it go, Rae. It was us or him that night. We all knew that."

Raven's grip on her tea cup was like iron, her knuckles stretched white as the clay cracked beneath her fingertips. _Robin. _Rage spewed his name like vomit, her nails sharp as she clawed up the inside of Raven's mind, searching for a weak spot; Raven feared she'd found it in their leader.

"My point is - if something's wrong, let it out. If you keep it locked up, you're gonna explode... and we've already been throught that."

Raven groaned as drops of hot tea began to trickle into her lap, recalling the night when her fear shook the tower - _No_, she thought franticly, _it'll be worse_. She heard the faint splintering sound of ceramic, the parting of Cyborg's lips as he let out an exasperated sigh, the creak of his gears as he shifted to look at her. Rage was chuckling in her veins, in her head; poised and ready to pounce.

"Raven… there's no going back. Slade's dead, and this time he's never coming back. Robin's right, you need to move on-"

Raven's chest tightened in agony as her restraint snapped, her skin stretched thin as paper over her ribs. The sound that left her throat was like razorblades against glass, sharp and unnerving as she curled into herself. The cup disintegrated into dust between her fingers, particles of white sand whooshing through the air like powder and peppering the floor.

Cyborg was instantly before her, crouched on one knee as he searched for the source of her pain, his face imploring and frenzied. But Raven couldn't see him, could barely feel him as his strong fingers wrapped around her biceps and squeezed. A garbled resemblance of her name echoed in her ears, but she couldn't get a fix on it, couldn't focus and make it clear. Her powers were excruciating as they raced to build the momentum she'd been denying, a crackling pit of hot electricity sparking and snapping within the sorest part of her core. _Run. Please lords, make him run._

"Raven, what is it?" Cyborg shook her roughly, watching as every muscle in her body seemed to tighten and tense, her face a twisted mask of unimaginable anguish. The sudden sensation of heavy static gagged the air, plastering an electric taste across his tongue and filling his nostrils with the scent of danger. He wasn't fast enough.

Raven felt her power surge like a tsunami, brutal and crashing before it burst free of her body, tearing through the heavy molecules of oxygen and slamming into something solid. The sound was louder than thunder and it echoed in Raven's muffled ears as she felt herself rip backward, shredding through cushion and spring and wood. Her gut dropped in dark surprise as she met air. Her spine hit the floor hard, her cape tearing against the cold tile as she slid. She hit the stairs with a bang, and there was a revolting _crack!_ as her shoulder took the brunt of the blow. She cried out at the sudden pain.

Once the echoes of her voice died away, the room was tomblike in its silence, and her powers receded almost gracefully; totally silent, totally sated.

There was nothing. Nothing but the slow, suffering rise and fall of her chest and the throbbing ache in her arm. The ceiling stared down at her, and though there was nothing to see but sleek, gray paneling, Raven had the surest feeling that it was scowling at her. She tilted her head and her neck smarted something awful, the pain sharp as it strained from her jaw to her collar bone. She hissed at the pain, feeling tears of shock spill down her cheeks as she clenched her teeth and pulled herself upright.

The room was in ruins, stuffing and material strewn across the floor, chunks of wood and metal scattered all the way to where she sat. The couch was beyond repair, but that wasn't what forced Raven to her feet. Each of the great room's large windows were gone, blown out completely, and glass lay sparkling like crystals across the floor. Cyborg was no where to be found.

The fragments of crystal crunched beneath Raven's feet at she sprinted to the window, hair stuck to her face from the wetness of her tears as she leaned out the opening; her palm sliced on the jagged glass jutting from the frame. For yards and yards, diamonds of glass covered the rocks below like a testament of her horror, and when she saw the crippled body of her friend, she had to resist the urge to cry out.

Her faze was immediate and before she'd even finished, she was on the ground beside him, willing her healing powers into her hands and pressing them against any and all flesh she could find. Blood was everywhere, staining the sand around them, and Raven tried in vein to ignore the warm, revolting feel of it against her fingers as she worked. Her fissure of wild power had left her vulnerable to her emotions and fresh tears came with her panic, her hands shaking as she tried to focus. Blue chunks of his armor were scattered across the dirt like tiny ruins, and there was _**so much bloo**_- Raven shuddered with a ragged sob and a boulder exploded a yard away_. Control, Control. _

"Cyborg, can you hear me?" her voice was hoarse in her ears, her fingers set hard against his neck as she prayed for a pulse, "Answer me, Cy, _please_."

He spoke then, softly, but whatever he said was muddled by the blood in his mouth. Raven's heart slowly began to rebuild itself, a sudden jolt of happiness surging through her as a steady, strong pulse began to thunder against her fingers; he wasn't dead. Relief was the tonic her nerves needed and with a beautifully clear, level head, Raven took control of her powers and fazed them both back to the tower.

Once Cyborg was safely settled on a clean expanse of tile flooring in the great room, Raven's momentary sanctuary vanished and her legs crippled beneath her; she hit the floor like an anvil. Drained and face down in the fragments from her earlier outburst, Raven timed the slow rhythm of her breathing, focusing on the fulfillment and wanting of her lungs in order to better ignore the renewing surge of power within. It was then that she heard them coming.

"Friend Cyborg! Raven!"

The distressed, sweet voice of Starfire broke Raven's heart, but she didn't have time to dwell on her shame. There were hands on her, strong, careful hands, and then she was on her back, staring into a set of beautiful, jade colored eyes.

"Raven, my friend, are you hurt?"

"What happened?"

Robin's voice had an immediate effect on her irritation level and Raven pushed at Starfire's chest, attempting to put a safety cushion of space between them. But the Tamaranian's strength made a mockery of her attempt and Starfire seemed quite oblivious to Raven's momentary struggle as she carefully checked her for wounds.

"You appear mostly undamaged," she announced happily a moment later, her cheeks lifting with a bright smile. Raven watched her joy with dark guilt and self disgust, her stomach clenching painfully as she turned her attention to their leader.

Robin was on his knees, his hands flying every which way as he frantically checked Cyborg's vitals, "We need to get him to the infirmary. Raven," The stare he sent her was distant, _cold_, and Raven knew at that moment what it was like to be a villain in the eyes of this boy, "Do you feel well enough to carry him?"

The question barely concealed the toxin in his voice.

Starfire was instantly on her feet, a slender orange hand extended in an offering of assistance. Raven nodded, more to herself than to her leader, and accepted the alien's aid.

"Lift him as gently as possible."

Somehow, she managed to clear her mind, and with the quiet instability of the eye in the middle of a tornado, she wrapped Cyborg in a silken embrace of dark energy and led him away.

* * *

"Talk."

Her dark, amethyst eyes were apathetic beneath the orange glow of the kitchen lights and Robin felt his patience begin to wear thin. Running a hand through his disheveled hair, he glared at her, "Well?"

Raven turned her face away, "There's nothing to say."

"No? Nothing about the obliterated main room? Or Cyborg?"

Her heartbeat quickened with her annoyance and Raven turned back to him with a warning stare. Inside, she was begging him to walk away, "Don't push this, Robin."

With an exasperated groan, he pushed his chair away from the table, climbing to his feet, "You know I can't have you here if you're a threat to the team."

"Then tell me to leave."

Robin caught the subtle desperation beneath her usual monotone and turned to stare at her; his surveillance was as quick as it was scrupulous. He watched her chest subtly heave with her anger, observed the tension from clenched teeth that strained her jaw. The quiet panic blossoming behind her eyes startled him and he made quick note of the way she clutched the table, her knuckles transparent. Her lack of control was frightening. He frowned, "I can't help if you won't talk to me, Raven."

Raven felt her emotions tumble together, bleeding like colors off a ruined painting and blending until they were the shade of fetid sewage; for a fraction of a second, she couldn't hold them back, "I don't _want _to talk to you, Richard."

He was momentarily surprised by the viciousness in her voice, "Well then who _do_ you want to talk to?"

With her restraint, Raven's ribs caved against her trembling heart, painful and constricting as she pulled herself back together. At her silence, Robin sighed and turned away.

She watched him stalk around the room, watched his muscles stress and flex in the shadowy darkness. His thoughts were angry, biting, and Raven fought hard to suppress the dark emotion festering in her veins.

Like a feral animal caught in a snare, he swiftly turned to glare at her, and Raven heard that name whisper across his mind. She was lost before she realized.

"When are you going to let this go? Look what it's doing to you - to the _team_-"

The sudden hostility in the room was nearly overpowering and Raven heard Robin falter as he watched her fingertips slowly dig into the metal table top. When she spoke, her voice was distorted, cruel, "I'm not _you_, Robin. Not everything for me revolves around Slade_._"

She could practically hear the hurt as it burst to life within him and knew that if there had been any alarm of warning inside him, it was now gone. She didn't care.

"Then what _is_ this about?" he quipped, "Enlighten me."

Raven suddenly found herself in his face, red eyes glowering into his white ones, her fingers clenching and unclenching at her sides. In her mind, she contemplated every painful, sick method of pain she could use against him. Rage chuckled.

Her hatred smothered him, and Robin could feel it as it soaked into his skin, slowly, lovingly corrupting him. He wanted to hurt her. It was almost a need. He _needed_ to reach out and wrap his hands around that pale, slender throat. He fought the urge with a fierce vengeance, taking a step back. The connection broke with the distance and the ugly desire disappeared.

She was on the other side of the room before he could take a breath, her back unfeeling to his gaze as she faced the glassless windows, her shoulders hunched and quivering with forced strength.

"I-" her voice broke and she tilted her head in shame, "I have to go."

Robin could feel the static in the air as it charged around him, could taste the metallic promise of electricity. He watched her fingers twitch before curling into fists, saw the muscles of her back pull taunt and turn rigid. She was deteriorating before his eyes and he could do nothing. He had never felt so incapable.

"Tell me what you want me to do."

The vulnerability in his voice made Raven's soul shudder and she turned to stare at him, "There's nothing you _can_ do."

"There's _never_ nothing."

She turned away, but he crossed the space between them in two strides and caught her arm in a firm grasp, "Raven," His glowing eyes were piercing in his determination, "Tell me."

At his touch, her panic spiked, and Raven's voice choked in her throat, "I need to leave."

His arms were instantly around her, pulling her close, and then she was over his shoulder. There was a loud _clank-_ing noise before Raven felt her stomach flip and the wind burst through her hair. The salty scent of ocean stung her nose, the slight nip of evening air as harsh as bitter winter against her heightened senses; she could feel her center squirm.

The impact with the sand jolted her, the reverberations shaking up her spine. And then they were moving, speeding across the beach, sand spraying like water behind them. His hard shoulder was like a hammer against her ribs as she bounced and Raven squeezed her eyes closed at the pain, feeling her emotions begin to cluster and pulsate in the tips of her fingers. She thought of the ocean and cracked her eyes open against the wind, watching as the waves crashed and rolled and died against the sandy shore. The pulse in her fingers became a constant, powerful buzz and her chest constricted in warning; she shouted for Robin to stop.

His feet stopped short in the sand and she yanked herself free just as the pain began to detonate, ripping through her body in wave after wave like a rapturous fire. She heard him call for her as she ran and as her vision began to fade from the growing blaze behind her eyes, she flew into the air, cresting over the waves before plummeting deep into the dark water.

The temperature hit her like daggers, bitingly cold and callous against her skin as her cape tangled around her legs. The undertow was strong and it pulled her down, pressing heavily against her chest as it tossed and tumbled her. She forgot which way was up or down or sideways and the panic set in, making her heart pump faster. With each beat, the pressure in her center thickened, heavier and heavier until it was intolerable. The explosion came with a vengence. Bubbles fled her mouth with her muffled scream and she fell back, feeling her muscles tense and her bones creak as the power thundered out from her fingers.

She watched it spread through the water with dazed eyes, its color far darker and more menacing than that of the black waves. The ocean roared, surging from the electric abomination she had released into its bowls. The currant tossed her to and fro more fiercely than before. She didn't fight it, feeling her arms and legs strain against the weightiness of the water.

Robin watched from the shore with weary eyes as the ocean stirred and began to swell, a strange flickering of dark light beneath the waves the only outline of the surge. It seemed to shiver as it rose, and just as he began to consider taking cover, it bottomed out with a rush of white noise. The tide crashed with thunderous weight against the shore, splashing him with icy droplets and within them, he could feel a menacing malice. His teammate did not resurface.

Below, Raven could sense her power expiring in the waves, could feel it recoil into nothingness. She floated somewhere between unconsciousness and insanity, her eyes wide against the darkness. Her chest seized from the lack of oxygen, her heart fluttering, spazing, and she hoped with all she that she was that death was near. It was then that Robin appeared, swimming with grace toward her and she chuckled at her foolishness; death was no friend to her, only an ally.

She felt him fist a handfull of her cape and allowed him to tug her to safety, feeling the icy water brush through her hair with a sad goodbye. Oceans were never very gracious about giving up trophies and she could sense the silent depth's disapointment. But it let them leave nonetheless. She cursed it vehemently for its mercy.

Robin broke the surface with a deep breath, his chest rising and falling as he gathered Raven's battered body to him and stroked toward the shoreline. He could feel her ribs expand and deflate with greed, hear the air scratch against her raw throat; he muttered a curse. _So, she had a death wish now?_

He gathered her unceremoniously in his arms when he could feel the ocean floor with his feet, and he waded cautiously toward the beach wearing a dark frown.

"Never again."

Raven didn't acknowledge him in any way and his frown turned ugly, his glowering white eyes lowering to her face, "You hear me?"

Amethyst glanced at him briefly before falling away, "Yes."

"Never, Raven. Promise me."

"Sure."

The cynicism in her voice made him grit his teeth and he plopped her on her ass in the cold sand. She glared up at him and he met her tit for tat, "Promise. Me."

She scowled, "I can't."

"But you're going to. Promise."

"I'd leave first."

"Not happening."

"Well then, there's your answer."

He kicked the sand in exasperation, running a hand back through his sopping hair, "Raven, this isn't a game. You would have died if I hadn't showed."

She pursed her lips and looked away, eyeing the water with a longing that chilled him.

"Raven."

The sincerity in his voice surprised her and she cast him a speculative look. His face was unreadable, "Nothing can be that bad. That's a permanent solution to a temporary problem."

She wanted to scoff, but she stayed the impulse. The last thing she needed was for him to worry any more then he already did, even if his statement was inaccurate. Her life meant death, so her death would mean life. Wasn't that a good enough reason?

Yes, she decided as she looked away, yes it was. But… they could never know, _he_ could never know. She sighed loudly, "I promise."

How she hated to lie.

* * *

_I know it's been a ridiculously long while, and I apologize. I've had kinda a rough year and I'm still trying to get back on my feet. Anyway, please tell me what you think! I'll try to get the next chapter out within the year! - haha, that's a joke people. Much, much sooner. I swear. - Death_


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